That’s right, kiddos. This shit’s been hyped and teased, and now, you can watch the entire self-titled Pretense documentary on our YouTube channel. Please share responsibly.
Credits:
Mad Dog….Himself
3000….Himself
Nolan Allan…..Nolan Allan
Adrian Nestico…..Rob Reiner
Chad…..Himself
Sparkz…..Photobomber #2
James Franco…..Various
Morgan Freeman…..John Tyler Mills
Andrea Ferguson….Diana Winters, high-powered film festival executive
Pretty androgynous,
did the thing where I waited until you were close to gauge
if you were for sure a female.
In fear of you being a guy and my sexuality shattered.
You didn’t notice me.
But I don’t care.
Failing at irony,
failing at post-irony,
a fetish
with technology
that was around before our time.
And technology,
that because of time,
Is more like techlology.
Pastel pink, pastel green, pastel yellow,
an Easter abomination, transportation the second function
No brakes, but a bell
ringringringringringringringringringringringringringring
A fool’s mating call.
Redshifting away with the milk crate,
standing on a ten degree upward slope,
to not the milk store.
Back room. Black room.
Bathroom.
YouTube.
Sometimes I draw lyrics from hats.
Sometimes I write pictures of bats.
Do we really understand enough about World War Two?
Hank Aaron.
Take a bow, kid. You’ve certainly earned it.
GUESS WHAT IS FREE
GET READY TO NOISE YR DICK OFF.
OFFICIAL BUSINESS
I HAVE PROPOSED AN IDEA
FREE
ASS
SAND
WICH
ES
DO YOU NOT KNOW THE FUCKING GOD DAMN RULES OF CORN HOLE
who will be the first to claim a sandwich?
BOARD 4 BOARD
I DO NOT LIKE THIS GAME BUT WE ARE GOING TO KEEP THIS SIMPLE NO CANCEL OUTS WE CANNOT FUCKING DECORATE THE BOARD CAROLINE
O NO
ES EL CORNBALLERO
(a poem by Mmm)
I think one day I’m going to asked to be ‘UNC safe-walked’ to my car.
Gender warz, y’all.
Class warz, y’all.
Are swans real things?
Devil’s avocado here, Larry.
Chicken-flavored potato chips.
Cuttin the cheese jokes.
OH WOW THIS IS A BIG ORANGE?
I really need my mom to help me pack.
Have you ever.
SEEN
A hyena?
They are moderately
larger than one would
Anticipate.
DUSTDUSTDUSTDUST
So hungry. But why are those plants pulled out like that?
Privelege, power, and difference. Socks with the fur.
Gray dome-like structures framed over New Balance shoes.
Shaved red heads. Phat asses.
Nolan and I wrote a poem tonight. Here it is. Continue reading
